Monday, October 27, 2008
Teenage Mutant Ninja Tattie
For tonight, I am Shredder. The flat is all signed for and, barring any last minute catastrophes, this time next week we'll be sitting in our "compact and bijou" (i.e. tiny) flat in "vibrant and edgy" (i.e. dodgy) Brixton. The week is going to drag, especially given we've been waiting for almost a month to move now and we've decided to have a week off the pop after a heavy birthday-related 7 days. So, we're busying ourselves with getting prepared, which tonight means finally shredding and binning 3 years worth of bank statements and paperwork. We got as far as sorting it before Spooks got in the way. Baby steps and all that. Cowabunga, indeed.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Must be fate...
That a lonesome little falklands islands pound coin has found its way into my wallet. "Return me to Stanley!", it brassily urges from my pocket... One day, young friend, one day,
Monday, October 20, 2008
Police in "doing their job" shocker
Makes a change from sitting on their fat arses eating doughnuts i suppose
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
Silence returns...
Given my recent efforts, it perhaps shouldn't be too much of a surprise, but the blog is about to go quiet again for a little while.... I'm packing my computer off to the countryside for a rest this evening until I move flat, plus I'm off to Poland on Sunday for a week. I'll try to keep you updated on proceedings in my little corner of the world between now and the end of the month, but safe to say that if I don't, you won't be missing out on much. I'm totally stressed about everything at the moment, and spent half of today on the phone to our letting agent trying to ensure things were going smoothly without trying to sound too panicked or desperate about the whole thing. My stomach is knotted into a ball and my hands are shaking, and work is suddenly somewhere I escape to for a bit of relaxation.
When I was a teenager, I thought I'd have a riverside apartment by 25 and be comfortably off with no money worries. Besides a couple of years messing about after uni, I haven't done that much wrong - so how has it come to this?
I'll see you on the other side. Hopefully. Roll on Polska and only having to worry about not speaking a bloody word of the language.
When I was a teenager, I thought I'd have a riverside apartment by 25 and be comfortably off with no money worries. Besides a couple of years messing about after uni, I haven't done that much wrong - so how has it come to this?
I'll see you on the other side. Hopefully. Roll on Polska and only having to worry about not speaking a bloody word of the language.
Tuesday, October 07, 2008
You wait 2 months....
....And finally reclaim your computer, and can't think of what it was you used to waste 3 hours a night doing on it. Honestly, am I just rubbish? Apart from Facebook surfing for 2 hours, I can't think of a single thing to do. I'm actually watching Eastenders on BBC3 such is my lack of inspiration. Any suggestions? Keep 'em clean.
What's new? Well, I've somehow apparently evaded the credit crunch - insomuch as my bank has deemed me suitably lacking in ill-repute to lend me some money, hence getting round the potentially inconvenient "want to move but don't have any money " issue. Have to admit I was sweating, they've raped me for an interest rate I wouldn't have considered on a credit card a few years ago, and my dreams of being debt free in a year are dashed until I'm at least 33, but I have ready cash - or at least will once the paperwork is signed and returned. It eases a tiny bit of the stress that goes with trying to move, although I'm still sweating on the credit check. Whilst I believe I'm reasonably dependable, my co-residents through the past 12 years of rented accommodation may be less so and I'm probably somehow linked to any dodgy dealings on any of my addresses since 1997.
When I took the loan out I willingly bought Payment Protection Insurance - the biggest rip off in Christendom. I say willingly, what I mean is they told me I couldn't get the loan without it. In any event, it suddenly doesn't seem like such an awful idea - an extra grand on the loan versus a 40% plummet in my company's share price today, taking it to a whopping 90p a share. This from a bank that was worth 8 times that a year and a half ago. From looking on at the credit crunch from a position of mundane boredom, I suddenly feel very much a part of it.
What's new? Well, I've somehow apparently evaded the credit crunch - insomuch as my bank has deemed me suitably lacking in ill-repute to lend me some money, hence getting round the potentially inconvenient "want to move but don't have any money " issue. Have to admit I was sweating, they've raped me for an interest rate I wouldn't have considered on a credit card a few years ago, and my dreams of being debt free in a year are dashed until I'm at least 33, but I have ready cash - or at least will once the paperwork is signed and returned. It eases a tiny bit of the stress that goes with trying to move, although I'm still sweating on the credit check. Whilst I believe I'm reasonably dependable, my co-residents through the past 12 years of rented accommodation may be less so and I'm probably somehow linked to any dodgy dealings on any of my addresses since 1997.
When I took the loan out I willingly bought Payment Protection Insurance - the biggest rip off in Christendom. I say willingly, what I mean is they told me I couldn't get the loan without it. In any event, it suddenly doesn't seem like such an awful idea - an extra grand on the loan versus a 40% plummet in my company's share price today, taking it to a whopping 90p a share. This from a bank that was worth 8 times that a year and a half ago. From looking on at the credit crunch from a position of mundane boredom, I suddenly feel very much a part of it.
Sunday, October 05, 2008
Scratch my earlier post
For verily I hath stumbled across this, which makes my eyes water just reading it. Is this legal? Or do they still have surly blokes with baseball bats forming their "collections" department. Surely there must be rules in place to prevent companies like this offering such terms...? Gordon! Alistair! Sort it out!!
Who would be hard up enough to go for something like this? In what circumstances? How can you possibly need 2 grand that desperately that you would apply - the repayments alone are £200 a month. It beggars belief. I just hope it's a typo.
Provident financial loan - 2,000 over 3 years
Who would be hard up enough to go for something like this? In what circumstances? How can you possibly need 2 grand that desperately that you would apply - the repayments alone are £200 a month. It beggars belief. I just hope it's a typo.
Provident financial loan - 2,000 over 3 years
Jeez
I've just been looking at loans on Moneysupermarket.com. There are some companies offering credit at 64.1% - meaning to borrow 2 grand over 3 years would result in you repaying almost 4. Dark times.
Saturday, October 04, 2008
Hmmm
Am watching trans world sport, reminiscing about getting ready for mini-rugby in the late 80s and apologising to myself for smoking in my own room. Perhaps time for bed.
Moyles away from entertaining
I think the single most irritating thing in the UK must be Chris Moyles' intro "thing" at 6.30am. It's bad enough having to be awake at that hour. It's an inestimable amount worse to have to listen to this bird-song, strings and pretension heavy 15 minute long extravaganza. You can just imagine the thought shower at the buzz session. Let's put the dog on the table "boys". You're mid-30s men trying to appeal to 12 year olds. I'm surprised the Daily Mail hasn't tried to expose you yet. So. Explain. Why can't i stop listening to you?
It's feckin freezin
I know this as i've just been hanging out a kitchen window trying to wake up in order to escort j to the airport bus in an hours time... There are even stars visible in the sky, no great shakes in some of our more rural environs, but sufficiently odd in central Brixton to prompt a brief "ooh" from me as i hung precariously over someone's garden. I'm now back enveloped in polish conversation of which i understand not a jot. It's remarkably soothing though, to the point i'm in danger of a wholly inappropriate falling asleep episode...
Thursday, October 02, 2008
Super Seth
You've potentially heard about these already - short animations made by Seth McFarlane of Family Guy fame. For Burger King for some reason.
Very amusing though.
Very amusing though.
I managed to drag out my journalism career the other day
In that I mentioned smugly that I had two columns published in the Londonpaper. Increasingly, however, it's seeming pathetic when I tell people, "oh, yah, I wrote a couple of times for that rag..."
"really?" they'll ask, "when and what about?".
"err, once two years ago and once about a year ago. The first time about an inability to grow a beard and the second about rescuing a fly from my pint". Cue a kind of stunned silence, metaphorical tumbleweed landing in our drinks and a quick change of subject.
It's not that I don't want to write anything, it's just so bloody difficult to come up with something worth writing about. It's kind of like when you graduate from university - you spend four years thinking you're the dogs bollocks, of equal stature to your peers, and then suddenly, without any real warning, you're thrust blinking and unsteady in the big bright world at large. You can do whatever you want. You just have to have a goal and you can achieve it.
As I feel is apparent with the blog, I was much better at writing when I had specific subject matter - namely the first 10K and the people who were sponsoring me on my way to running it. Now I have to generate my own chat, and I'm honestly at a bit of a loss. Likewise with the columns, the first time I wrote one I was able to do it without pressure or fear of failure, because I was just doing something new. Once I'd done it, and got 100% "more" from the readers, I found myself under all kinds of self-initiated pressure to maintain the standard and found I couldn't, a feeling only compounded by not hitting the mark the second time around.
As another columnist from the paper proved, it's only the talented few who can be given free-wheeling remit to write about whatever the hell takes their fancy and still make it witty and entertaining. There used to be a very entertaining column called "City Boy", where a faceless banker laid bare the dark(er) side of investment banking. However, it only worked when he was doing the job and when he was unknown. As soon as he quit his job and was unmasked, the quality of his column has plummeted. All he can think to write about these days are idle musings and boasts on his new found "celebrity". It hasn't helped that he turned out to be nothing like the mental image I had built up in my head, instead resembling a nerdy IT bloke. Trying to reconcile this image with the tales of romancing and financial derring do just doesn't work.
Even my favourite columnists from the Guardian - Jon Ronson and Charlie Brooker - have parameters in which to work. One writes (or wrote) about his life as a 30-40-something middle class father, whilst the other is given free reign to destroy whatever TV detritus wanders into his sights. I suppose the difference is, those "spontaneous" writers have the ability to form ideas in their head and mold something meaningful around them.
The column is, of course, just an example of the bigger picture. The only problem with a lifetime of encouragement and confidence building from my parents and friends is that I believe I could actually do anything if I put my mind to it - I just don't know what. And rather than try a load of different things or devote any real time to investigating my motivations, I instead plod along in a McJob and lament never getting to where I don't realise I want to go.
Bah. Just think - if I'd had more imagination, you wouldn't have had to just sit through all that. Am off to watch Family Guy. That'll help.
"really?" they'll ask, "when and what about?".
"err, once two years ago and once about a year ago. The first time about an inability to grow a beard and the second about rescuing a fly from my pint". Cue a kind of stunned silence, metaphorical tumbleweed landing in our drinks and a quick change of subject.
It's not that I don't want to write anything, it's just so bloody difficult to come up with something worth writing about. It's kind of like when you graduate from university - you spend four years thinking you're the dogs bollocks, of equal stature to your peers, and then suddenly, without any real warning, you're thrust blinking and unsteady in the big bright world at large. You can do whatever you want. You just have to have a goal and you can achieve it.
As I feel is apparent with the blog, I was much better at writing when I had specific subject matter - namely the first 10K and the people who were sponsoring me on my way to running it. Now I have to generate my own chat, and I'm honestly at a bit of a loss. Likewise with the columns, the first time I wrote one I was able to do it without pressure or fear of failure, because I was just doing something new. Once I'd done it, and got 100% "more" from the readers, I found myself under all kinds of self-initiated pressure to maintain the standard and found I couldn't, a feeling only compounded by not hitting the mark the second time around.
As another columnist from the paper proved, it's only the talented few who can be given free-wheeling remit to write about whatever the hell takes their fancy and still make it witty and entertaining. There used to be a very entertaining column called "City Boy", where a faceless banker laid bare the dark(er) side of investment banking. However, it only worked when he was doing the job and when he was unknown. As soon as he quit his job and was unmasked, the quality of his column has plummeted. All he can think to write about these days are idle musings and boasts on his new found "celebrity". It hasn't helped that he turned out to be nothing like the mental image I had built up in my head, instead resembling a nerdy IT bloke. Trying to reconcile this image with the tales of romancing and financial derring do just doesn't work.
Even my favourite columnists from the Guardian - Jon Ronson and Charlie Brooker - have parameters in which to work. One writes (or wrote) about his life as a 30-40-something middle class father, whilst the other is given free reign to destroy whatever TV detritus wanders into his sights. I suppose the difference is, those "spontaneous" writers have the ability to form ideas in their head and mold something meaningful around them.
The column is, of course, just an example of the bigger picture. The only problem with a lifetime of encouragement and confidence building from my parents and friends is that I believe I could actually do anything if I put my mind to it - I just don't know what. And rather than try a load of different things or devote any real time to investigating my motivations, I instead plod along in a McJob and lament never getting to where I don't realise I want to go.
Bah. Just think - if I'd had more imagination, you wouldn't have had to just sit through all that. Am off to watch Family Guy. That'll help.
Wednesday, October 01, 2008
Relief at last
As we speak, J is on the South Coast putting the finishing touches to her thesis, thus (hopefully) bringing to an end months of stress.... It looked very impressive to my untrained eye, and all we can do now is wait and see what more educated people make of it...
It means I can reclaim the PC for a bit as well, thus enabling me to update the blog a wee bit ore regularly. Not much has been happening at Tattie Towers of late - in fact not much has been happening at all. I've somehow managed to both do nothing and be rubbish at keeping in touch with people, all at the same time. Quite impressive I'm sure you'll agree.....!
My main focus has been on trying to find somewhere to live, as we move out of the current house in a month's time. We think we might have found somewhere, but I'll wait until we've definitely decided and managed to get a holding deposit down before expanding further, what with fate having a nasty habit of eavesdropping on such conversations. Suffice to say it is most things my first step away from communal living should be, in that it's tiny, expensive and in the centre of an urban (and vaguely poverty stricken) sprawl. What wasn't in the script is that it's all newly refurbished (to the point where it's a building site at the moment) so the "grotty and freezing" boxes on the list may remain unticked.... My main focus for the rest of the evening is working out how two people can survive in a bedroom that's only 70cm wider than our bed..... But if it works out, I'll be the happiest camper imaginable, at least until my usual grumpiness kicks back in.
Besides that, I am facing a further period of non-internet access as I debate whether to foist my computer on someone for a few weeks to avoid bailiffs who are now visiting our house in the middle of the night to hand deliver god knows what through the door. It all seems to relate to a former resident, hence up to this point I have been returning said summons' to sender, and have not had the balls to open this one to see what it says. I feel slightly aggrieved that I need to get involved at all to be honest, given that I've not been here for nearly as long as some of the other residents. Hmm, we'll see.
Beyond that, in two weeks I will have waved my mum off at Gdansk airport, as she completes her first visit to meet J's parents in Poland. It's all very peculiar, not to mention unintentionally significant. She doesn't speak a word of Polish, they don't speak a word of English, and she was only invited because I was going on the last time I was there about how similar they were and she fancied seeing a new country. It will be interesting to say the least. Kurwa.
It means I can reclaim the PC for a bit as well, thus enabling me to update the blog a wee bit ore regularly. Not much has been happening at Tattie Towers of late - in fact not much has been happening at all. I've somehow managed to both do nothing and be rubbish at keeping in touch with people, all at the same time. Quite impressive I'm sure you'll agree.....!
My main focus has been on trying to find somewhere to live, as we move out of the current house in a month's time. We think we might have found somewhere, but I'll wait until we've definitely decided and managed to get a holding deposit down before expanding further, what with fate having a nasty habit of eavesdropping on such conversations. Suffice to say it is most things my first step away from communal living should be, in that it's tiny, expensive and in the centre of an urban (and vaguely poverty stricken) sprawl. What wasn't in the script is that it's all newly refurbished (to the point where it's a building site at the moment) so the "grotty and freezing" boxes on the list may remain unticked.... My main focus for the rest of the evening is working out how two people can survive in a bedroom that's only 70cm wider than our bed..... But if it works out, I'll be the happiest camper imaginable, at least until my usual grumpiness kicks back in.
Besides that, I am facing a further period of non-internet access as I debate whether to foist my computer on someone for a few weeks to avoid bailiffs who are now visiting our house in the middle of the night to hand deliver god knows what through the door. It all seems to relate to a former resident, hence up to this point I have been returning said summons' to sender, and have not had the balls to open this one to see what it says. I feel slightly aggrieved that I need to get involved at all to be honest, given that I've not been here for nearly as long as some of the other residents. Hmm, we'll see.
Beyond that, in two weeks I will have waved my mum off at Gdansk airport, as she completes her first visit to meet J's parents in Poland. It's all very peculiar, not to mention unintentionally significant. She doesn't speak a word of Polish, they don't speak a word of English, and she was only invited because I was going on the last time I was there about how similar they were and she fancied seeing a new country. It will be interesting to say the least. Kurwa.
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